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kill me now

I'm bad at Livejournal anymore :(

Anyways, I don't know what to say. Thanksgiving was pretty dumb. Eddie's still being a jerk, but that might be getting better so I can hope. We're trying to get our shit together for Ohayocon, which isn't helped by our cameraman being a emo douchebag. We still don't even have the raw footage from Youma! It's too late for anyone who was there to care now, but we do need it for advertising. It's snowing and there's ice all over everything, and of course (OF COURSE) my defrosters/heater died sometime in November. I spent all day at work reorganizing the "Stupid Christmas Chapstick, Gift Sets, Stocking Stuffers and Kids' Bath/Body Products" aisles, only to have dozens of assholes come right behind me and destroy everything again. I seriously had to tell some bitch to stop opening the gift sets unless she was going to buy them, and she acted like that request was TOTALLY OVER THE LINE. What the fuck have we come to?

I just want Christmas to be over. I'm sick of people correcting my "Happy Holidays" with "NOOO, IT'S MERRY CHRISTMAS JESUS BLAHRHHGGHHH", I'm sick of cleaning up after jerks, I'm sick of arguing about toys, and I'm sick of little kids doing whatever the fuck they want because "IT'S CHRISTMAS!!" THERE AIN'T GONNA BE A CHRISTMAS IF I STRANGLE YOUR KIDS WITH A SHOPPING BAG, YOU WHITE-TRASH CUMDUMPSTER.

I am so full of hate.
Are you planning to host Thanksgiving at your place or will you travel to see family and/or friends? Do you prefer a traditional menu or something entirely different?

Oh, why not.

I'm not hosting, haha. We live in a one-bedroom apartment and we don't even have our table assembled...no good place to put it >_> Someday I do want to host though, when we have our own house, mostly because I'm lazy and hate driving to these things. We're travelling to Narnia (long story) to see my family, then heading back into town to see Davi's...THEN I will finally get to rest. Of course I work Black Friday so yeah. Also, I don't care about the food as long as there's pie and a shrimp ring.

Anyways, today was the WORST FUCKING DAY EVER. JESUS MOTHERLOVING CHRIST. I have been screamed at about donuts, kids stealing my bags and mommy thinking I SHOULDN'T BE SO MEAN ABOUT IT (didn't apologize for that one), not putting the bags in the cart (we never do this), turkey prices, my (extremely good, thank you) bagging skills, saying Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas, ANYFUCKINGTHING YOU CAN THINK OF. I admit it, I totally lost it on the last customer (the one about the donuts), I'd been there eight hours, lined out to apparel the entire time, and this old bitch was yelling about the price of the donuts and I just unleashed on her. I think they were more scared than mad haha. I'm not proud of it, but only because I don't want to get in trouble at work. I would LOVE to just tear someone's head off at least once a day for my own mental health, but I do like being employed. I don't think they said anything to my CSM and I hope they don't call, but I'm well-liked enough that odds are whoever takes their complaint if they do complain won't even say anything about it.

At least I have tomorrow, Thanksgiving, off. It's not even really a day off because like I said, driving home to see my family. I'm not looking forward to it. Being the black sheep of the family kind of puts a damper on these holiday things. I don't care what they think of us or our life, but I don't like making it awkward for my parents and grandma. It's really my aunt that's the problem, and now we're having all these problems with my sister and Eddie too...at least Eddie won't be there. Whatever, whoever has a problem with my socialist, cohabiting, cranky, childfree, anti-American ass can eat a dick.

I am dyeing my hair tonight, too. Red again~ I need to look nice while I'm at awkward holiday gatherings, I guess. I mean seriously, who has Thanksgiving dinner at noon? I'm usually not even awake for another two hours and I certainly don't want to eat turkey and gravy in the morning.

Anyways, I hope you all have a nice Thanksgiving and that you don't have to work Friday x_X

ugh it's too earlyyyy

So I wake up this morning to my landlord BEATING DOWN THE GODDAMN DOOR and I tried to ignore him but it didn't work, so I answer the door in my pajamas and he's like "OH HEY THERE'S A GUY COMING TO MEASURE THE WINDOWS IN AN HOUR" and it's like 11am and I work second shift and it's like wtfff nooooo but no, a guy came and measured the windows. The good news is new windows, because the old ones are old and drafty and the cats can open the screens. The bad news is that now I'm already up and I have to work until midnight so wtf universe. The good probably outweighs the bad but I am bitter and cranky.

So it's been quiet around here. There's a little friend/family tension and some band tension going on but I think it's all minor. As long as the band is ready for Ohayocon and no one gets into any huge fights I don't care. Still need to set a date for the wedding. Dave's being reluctant because of the money but I mean, that's not going to change for quite some time so we had better just figure out a way to make it work. I did call one of the main event-hall things in the area and it's like, $35 PER HEAD and I'm like wtfff it has to be cheaper. The Ravenswood Hall has a tiki bar that can tap two kegs and that sounds more like it.


What’s on your “to-do” list to prepare for the holidays? How will you use technology to help you get everything done?

Well this is dumb. I plan on using technology to distract myself from my shitty retail job because everyone else is having a HIGH OLD TIME racking up debt for my generation to pay off in the name of JESUS' BIRTHDAY.

Share this: live within your means, teach your kids to accept NO and be nice to your cashier. Fuck this Web 2.0 Sharing Life!!!1 bullshit, get off my internet unless you know how the damn thing works.

(;´ρ`) グッタリ

My goodness, I am so tired.

As you all know I work at the Mart of Walls, so obviously we're gearing up for the perfect storm. I don't like how they completely skip over Thanksgiving now...we have some baking stuff out and fall-themed dishes etc, but it's all taken over by the OMG CHRISTMAS!!! stuff. I like Thanksgiving, even though I'm pretty sure God didn't provide our one-bedroom compartment and our glorious $300 biweekly paychecks, so I pretty much have me and Davi to thank, lol. It's a no-pressure holiday and I like to cook.

So yeah, it's getting silly in there. I've been working a lot more hours and I just found out that I AM moving to overnights, which is great. Fewer people, more varied work, a raise, and more hours. Everyone on nights is very excited, lol. I suppose I am pretty amusing and I do this thing where I actually do work without complaining, so I'm pretty popular haha.

Davi and I still need to set a date though >_> My mother called this morning wanting details again and we just don't have them yet. We're not sure how we're going to pay for it, so it's kind of hard to give it a timeline, you know? I don't want it to be expensive, but there are some things...snip for wedding stuff, you probably don't care hahaCollapse )

Anyways, I need to get to work. Only four hours today and goddamn that's a relief.


Writer's Block: Change is good

If you could change one major thing about your life, whether a relationship, your job, your living situation, your school, etc., what would it be? Are you currently working toward a serious life transition?

I usually don't want to do these, but this one is kind of relevant.

My big thing is my credit.  Woo interesting, I know, but it's a big deal x_x I don't have a HUGE amount of debt, it's probably something around $5000.  A lot of the things I owe are products of my own stupidity; for example, I have a credit card that had a limit of $250 that I owe something like $900 on now.  I've paid off that initial balance two or three times, only to have it keep on mutating into more and more debt.  I had a student loan for something like $2650, and lord knows how much THAT is now.  It's been like four years.  I owe two cash advances, which is probably the scariest part.  Bipolar disorder is a bitch, kids.  I'm in my right mind now and much more fiscally responsible, but I had to take a terrible job after being unemployed for months and months and no matter how hard I work there, I'm not going to make much more than basic living costs, let alone pay it down without just throwing money into a black hole only to have the payments immediately replaced by more interest.  It's really discouraging.  

The solution?  Bankruptcy.  My credit is something like 440 right now, which is downright terrible.  Sometimes the best thing to do is burn it down and let it regrow.  My parents did it years ago, and they survived.  I just need to do it before we actually get married so he isn't tied to my piddly yet significant debt.  It's hilarious that I, a hardworking, intelligent, and productive person can't get any help from anywhere, let alone something wild like health insurance, while crackhead baby-spewing toothless uneducated losers can get thousands a month from the government for doing fuckall but leeching off everyone else.  I hate them and I think they should be lined up out back and shot.

Anyways, ahem.  My serious life transition is getting my shit together.  I've made a lot of personal progress that should make the legal/financial/life part of it easier.  The plan is bankruptcy, marriage, college.  I KNOW I can get into pretty much any school I want, so I just need to fill in the blanks between now and the future.  

In five years I hope to have respectable credit, a house, and a degree and job as a librarian.  I hope Davi is either done or well on his way to his teaching degree, and that's pretty much all I want.  No kids, ever.  Just that perfect combination of hedonism, academia, true science, seeking and love that has always called me to better things.

oh em gee

So Youmacon was INSANELY AWESOME.  I'll write a good con report later, but I'll just point out some highlights...

+) Our shows were AWESOME.  I mean, we led an entire crowd of dancing, moshing, skanking cosplayers and otaku in a chorus of Haruka Kanata, Rewrite, Ready Steady Go...all kinds of stuff.  We played four times and they were all awesome.  Friday night was the craziest show I've ever played, and that's even taking into account the rap festival we played.

+) Two words: GREEN ROOM.  It was on the 11th floor, guests and staffers, and it was free food, drink, and top shelf booze all weekend.  Caitlin Glass made us quesadillas.  Tony Glass is a seriously awesome dude and we got smashed together haha.  Lemon Demon and the Bards are awesome all the time.  Seriously good times and we hung out with a lot of awesome guests.

+) Davi took 2nd in the BlazBlue tournament and won us enough money to last the week lol.  He lost to Seon Panther, who is randomly a dude he knew from XBL and one of the top Ragnas on the server.  He came up to our room and played later, along with Alex from the Bards who is a friend of ours too.  It was amazing.  The only reason Matt didn't make it to the finals is because Dave beat him, lol.

+) Our incredible fans Ren and Jessica from Poho were there, came to every show, and took tons of high quality pictures.  They're incredible and we're so lucky to have such awesome fans.  Also, Nick at Youma was amazing and is the proud owner of the only Cowboy Shogun tshirt in circulation, lol.  If you want one let us know!  They are really cute black and white baseball shirts with our rising sun/ninjacowboypanda logo and they are $15.

+) The biggest news of all is that Davi and I are now engaged :) It happened Saturday night and now we have the geekiest wedding EVER to plan.

I'm completely exhausted now but I still have to go to work, haha.  I'll write more later, and let me know how your Youmacon went!


sunny day~

It's pretty nice out today, but cold :( We didn't really get a summer for some reason. Michigan, you vex me.

Going to work in a little bit and then I'm off for a day ~ woohoo! I mean, I have to do a ton of laundry and have band practice and sew and clean the house so it's still work, but it's not in a giant retail store either. I also get paid tonight at midnight, yay.

Fifteen days until Youma. I'm so excited! I hope I get to meet some sweet people and the shows go off without a hitch. The whole thing is going to cost each of us (minus spending money) only about $100 so that's an added bonus.

I'm also getting the stuff to custom-paint 360 controller faceplates. I'm doing Matt's before the con and hopefully if people like it I can pick up some commissions. We're also modding the dpads by sanding down the ring around the button itself and adding a thin plastic piece between the membrane and the interior, which adds a LOT of functionality, especially for things like fighting game inputs and quickly scrolling through menus, really anything you use the dpad for. If you've ever tried to use a 360 controller, you know what I'm talking about.

We're also doing Cowboy Shogun tshirts! They're 3/4 sleeve black and white baseball shirts (panda hurr) and this is the design. I drew the panda ninja cowboy, lol. It looks rough right now because Eddie doesn't know what he's doing with Photoshop but I'm going to fix it. Hopefully we can get them circulating a bit.

Need to get ready for work :( I hope it's busy but not chaos. Yesterday was absolute hell and I don't have any reason to expect today to be different, but I can dream, right?

It's so cold in here x_X This is an old apartment and the windows and especially the door are not what I'd call airtight. The windows aren't so bad, but we definitely need to hang something over the stupid door so we're not spending money to heat the porch and stairs. My living room looks like a blanket factory exploded in front of the TV.


Film festival was okay. Really cold x_x people were more confused by us than anything, I think. The panda was a big hit with the kids though. There was also some crazy preacher dude yelling about eternal damnation across the street and a bunch of people with "END TIMES!!" signs too. It was distracting and kind of offensive. He came over and tried to talk to Marty about Jesus xD Marty handled it pretty well, but I think we made it quite clear that we don't like that sort of thing. Preachers of death, huh...

Band practice was cold and we had no drummer. HOWEVER, completely against my expectations, we totally nailed 1/3 no Junjou na Kanjou. SO EXCITED HAHA. I really wanted to do that song all along, but apparently they put it together when I was at work and we full-combo'ed the whole thing today, even without Alfie. I know he has some problems with the breakdown, but if everyone else knows what's going on it'll be fine. I know that song lives in the hearts of many otaku so x3 I'm just happy we're doing it.

Work was work :( Some lady about threw a fit because she had waited a couple minutes for a manager to come and remove the security spider from her DVD player. Her reason? "There's a fire in my house right now!!" Ok lady, that's why you're in here with a cart full of groceries and a DVD player, right? She kept trying to pull the spider off, which would have made the alarms go off and all kinds of problems. I told her it'd be more trouble than it was worth, and she started yelling "WELL THERE GONE DUN BE TROUBLE WHEN MAH BOYFRIEND GETS IN HERE THERE'S A FIRE AT MY HOUSE BLARRGH" which was pretty spectacular to watch. This was a ~300lb lady in her 50s. I'd have loved to see the boyfriend, but I made myself scarce for break becaus I was afraid I was going to say something and get her really riled up.

I work the rest of the week too x_X I don't know when I'm ever going to get any sewing done between that and band practice. Audrey needs a shirt for the con, because he's not wearing his ratty Dir en grey hoodie. (Audrey is a CP El bjd btw) His shoes never came, either. Damn you mimiwoo! DAMN YOU.

Anyways :| This is rambling and I don't care ~ I need to try and get Davi out of bed or he'll sleep until 5 or so and then be up which isn't good for anyone >_>;

Also! Hello new friends ^_^ I need your help, if you can. Cowboy Shogun's supposed to be doing a panel at Youma and uhhh we REALLY don't know what to do xD I've done a lot of panels before, but they were jrock panels and yaoi panels and stuff. It's harder when it's you xD Can anyone think of something fun or interesting to do? I'd really love your suggestions <3


Ugh, it is raining halfheartedly.   I was up late last night with Davi and Marty and I didn't want to get up at all today.  I mostly just don't want to go to work.  Not sure I've got the stomach for all the noise and gossip and gross customers x_X Things are picking up already for the holidays and we're also plagued with a crazy, crazy bitch that we're all trying to get fired.  She freaks out customers, she harrasses employees, she comes in out of uniform, she just WON'T stay at her register and work...I'd personally like to pop her one in the jaw and send her home (on her stupid bike lol), but meh.  The other day she told me to have a kid and sell it to her for $5.  Now wtf is that?

So tomorrow, CS (well, me and Eddie and Dave and Marty the panda) is going to be playing outside at the Blue Water Film Festival and we're doing it unplugged, hehe.  It'll be interesting and it better not rain!  We've never done an acoustic set before, but we wanted to try it so we could sit around and cons and entertain ourselves/others.

I'm going back to sleep for a bit I think x_x